Of Love and Acceptance
by Blood Masks
Summary: A more mature approach to Yuuri's feelings about liking men in general, and Wolfram in particular.
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer:** I obviously do not and will probably never own Kyou Kara Maou or any of its characters, although I'd love to.

 **AN:** I wanted to experiment a little with a more serious approach to Yuuri's acceptance of his feelings for Wolfram and maybe even go further than that. This will probably have a very different tone than any of my other stories so far, but with recent events I felt necessary to approach this subject from a different angle. I won't give much of a summary plot-wise, but I hope you adventure into this with me, and like the results. This will be a very short chapter, the rest will be at least three of four times this length.

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 _Prologue._

Both boys sat in silence, the air in the room felt heavy and foul. The atmosphere had changed drastically around them, when a turn of conversation had opened a door, that until then, had remained closely guarded. The depth of the feelings that had been stored and pushed away seemed to drawn them, although for different reasons.

"He just doesn't understand, you know?" Shibuya said with a heavy voice, filled with so much sadness it made Ken's heart sink.

"But I also don't really know if I want him to understand, I don't know if I can be that selfish" he said and covered his eyes with his left hand, while the right clutched the fabric of his pants, around the knee. He was trying to remain grounded, and probably even talking about this had required most of his determination.

Ken was seated on the chair by Shibuya's desk, at his earthen home, and Shibuya was on his bed. They had to get back to Shin Makoku, and were supposed to do so about two hours ago, but the conversation hadn't permitted it. It hadn't started like this, but there's a limited amount of time you can run away from something.

"I think I get what you mean, actually making him understand would be a cruelty." Ken said, turning around to face the door. Understanding homophobia, making only the word travel to a world where it had never existed, seemed like such a cruel thing to do, to so many people who dreamed all of their lives with a place where that word meant nothing, destroying that beautiful aspect of the other world by introducing such a term… and Shibuya was already doing it, he had been doing it for years, even if unintentionally.

"But soon even that won't matter. You are losing him Shibuya, you need to make a choice" Ken hated to push his friend even more, if someone understood what Shibuya was going through, it was him, for more than one reason.

Being raised in Japan meant little to no acceptance towards homosexuals, it was a subject people there would usually just try to avoid, or hide. In general, japanese people were very private about their personal life, especially as they got older. You could call it _don't ask don't tell_ maybe… not illegal, but frowned upon, a lot. It was not uncommon, even to that day, for openly homosexual people to be disowned or have a lot more trouble trying to find a job or even rent an apartment. People just weren't open about it, for custom's sake, for fear of rejection, of discrimination, of violent retaliations.

It was unnatural, disgusting, unfruitful. They were thought by many to be of loose morals, ridden with diseases and addictions. People who were not an asset to society, people to be ashamed of, people to keep away from...

That was the mindset Shibuya was trying to fight right now, within himself, and it was slowly killing him, a kind of hardship Wolfram von Bielefeld, who had lived his life entirely in Shin Makoku, would never understand.

"I don't want that, I really don't want to lose him… I just…" Shibuya covered his entire face then, with both his hands and groaned, angry maybe with himself, maybe with the world, maybe with all of it. "I just don't know what to do… I don't know how to make things better…"

It broke Ken's heart to see his friend like this, someone with such a beautiful soul and such a kind heart, reduced to tears of self hatred because of such a nonsensical belief, because of such a stupid way of thinking. It had been this kind of unmeasurable hate in people's hearts, for those who are different than them, that had created the Sousho in the first place. Hatred was an immensely harmful thing, he knew it too well, and even Shibuya, who shone brightly as the sun, wasn't impervious to it.

"Why did I have to be like this Murata?" Shibuya asked, a small crack on his voice made Ken realize his friend was almost at his limit, the limit of his sanity, but also of acceptance, he _was_ like that, whether he liked it or not, now at least he had admitted that.

"There's nothing wrong with love Shibuya" Ken said in a serious tone, he meant every word, not in the greeting card cliché manner that some people said it, he really believed it, he had learned it through many lives, in which he remembered his soul had loved in just as many different ways.

"There's nothing wrong with you either" Ken added and turned to his friend with a small smile. He waited until his friend finally uncovered his eyes, showing some unshed tears still fighting to pass the barrier of his eyelashes.

"Some part of me thinks that too, or at least it wants to" Shibuya finally answered.

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Please do leave a review, since this is an experiment, I would really appreciate your feedback.


	2. Admission

**AN:** I'm taking some liberties with time and time perception in this story, to come up with a coherent timeline that includes both Shin Makoku's and Earth's time, and also to accommodate the date on Earth in this story to the present (2016).

Also, on a completely unrelated note, today is my birthday so yey! I'll be updating this story and also posting the last chapter of Faded Moon today as a celebration

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 _Admission._

They had returned really late that night and Yuuri found only Conrad was there to greet them, as they came out of the fountain at Shinou's temple. After a short hot bath, he had gone to bed, a little annoyed because Wolfram wasn't in the Castle at all, which was becoming more and more frequent in the past couple of months.

Wolfram had taken more shifts patrolling the inner city with his troops. About four months ago, they found out a suspicious group of individuals had been causing several disturbances for the shop owners of the town, usually around midnight, and the lot had proven too sneaky to be found by the regular guards of the city, no trace of them once the soldiers got to the shops.

What they wanted wasn't really clear, hardly stealing anything, it seemed more like they were looking for something specific, and the level of their skills suggested they weren't only regular thieves. Conrad had informed him quickly about the new developments, when they made their way to the Castle. The situation was pretty much under control, and no disturbances had occurred since Wolfram and his troop took on the patrol. They had either decided it was too risky, or they had already found what they wanted, but nothing of special value had gone missing.

Yuuri shifted in the bed, unable to get to sleep, it must had been around three in the morning. For some reason it was hard for him to sleep in that huge bed without Wolf, well, he actually knew the reason, but going over the subject again was definitely not going to help him get to sleep any faster.

He moved closer to Wolfram's side of the bed and missed the blond's warmth next to him, Wolf's body temperature was always a bit high, maybe because he was a fire user, maybe because he was just hot… Oh… those thoughts again. Yuuri shook his head trying to wash away the feeling that was creeping up his stomach, and soon found himself falling into a somewhat shallow sleep.

He wasn't sure how much time has passed, or if he had slept at all, but he probably had, because when he drowsily opened his eyes Wolfram was already in his nightwear and climbing on the bed. What time was it exactly? The sunrise was probably close, even though it was still dark, he could perfectly see the blond next to him.

"Sorry, did I wake you?" Wolfram asked in a whisper.

"Not really" Yuuri answered, still wondering when exactly had he fallen asleep.

Wolfram adjusted himself on the bed, fairly close to Yuuri who then realized he had moved in his sleep to Wolfram's side almost completely, but still the blond made a point on staying as far away from him as possible, laying flat on his back, almost on the edge of the bed. That annoyed Yuuri for some reason, still a bit dizzy from just waking up, or maybe not completely awake. Perhaps that was the reason he didn't notice his arm moving, until his hand was on Wolfram's stomach.

Yuuri sensed Wolfram stiffen at the touch, but soon relaxed into it and moved closer, placing his hand over Yuuri's. There was something odd in the air, something intoxicating all of a sudden.

Yuuri fixated his eyes of Wolfram's chest for a moment. The muscular body could be distinguished under the thin layer of clothing, as it went slowly up and down with every breath. Even though his hand was on Wolfram stomach, he could still feel Wolfram's heartbeat, which seemed to accelerate, as did his breathing.

Yuuri felt hypnotized by the motions and sounds, his senses were suddenly at overdrive. He knew he had to stop this, he had to move away, but for the life of him he could not remember the reasons why. He felt hot and suffocated, struggling to control the sudden unevenness of his own breathing. Yuuri wanted the body that was next to him, he wanted to touch it, feel it under him, he knew that, and still didn't know how to do it, how to close the gap between them, he was afraid to move or speak.

After what seemed like an eternity, Wolfram was the one to move, slowly lifting the hand that had been on top of his until that point, and tracing a path with his fingertips through Yuuri's wrist and arm, sending chills down Yuuri's spine, that quickly traveled directly to his groin. He had to bite his lower lip to drown the whimper he felt coming up his throat.

Only then he looked up to Wolfram's face, the first rays of sunlight were enough for his face to be completely visible. Yuuri was struck dumb for a second. Wolfram was looking back at him with his mouth slightly open, short and hot breaths coming out of it. A loose golden strand of hair fell on his left cheek. And those eyes, those entrancing and beautiful emerald eyes, were pinning his very soul down, they were filled with lust and determination.

Yuuri's hand moved up from its former position trembling, as if it had a will on its own, to cup Wolfram's cheek softly. They stared into each other's eyes for seconds that felt like hours.

"Wolf… I…" Yuuri started to speak, not sure of what he wanted to say, but was cut short by soft pink lips placed on his. For a second the entire world was tunned out, Yuuri wasn't even able to hear his own breathing or beating heart. He opened his mouth in a soundless gasp that gave Wolfram entrance. Before he knew what was happening a strong, yet gentle arm, was wrapped around his waist and pulling him closer, while his own hand clenched the fabric of Wolfram's pajamas.

Clumsy and slow motions were soon followed by quick and desperate ones, as he felt Wolfram's tongue expertly coil, retracting and pushing forwards, sending electric waves of pleasure throughout his entire body..

Yuuri's mind was blank, the room was spinning around them, his body was taking over, and rejecting any resistance from his mind, he felt light headed, inebriated by Wolfram's scent and body heat.

It took only half a second between noticing Wolfram's hand gone from his side, and being pinned down under him, as Wolfram took him by the wrist and rolled him on his back, moving on top of him to straddle him, all in a single motion.

At that moment Yuuri was painfully aware on every inch of his body and the feelings that traveled up and down of it every second that passed, the erection under his pants grazing with Wolfram's with every breath they took, making Yuuri's mind unable to process anything, and every muscle on his body tense in thrilling anticipation.

And there they were those eyes again, gleaming with desire, passion and fire, locked down on his. He was powerless to stop this and he didn't want to anymore, he didn't care, he wanted it, he wanted it all so badly it made his very skin hurt.

Yuuri lifted his free hand to grab Wolfram's nape and bring him closer again.

But then…

A knock on the door made Yuuri sit up on the bed with a jump. Confused and short of breath, he looked around and found Wolfram sleeping deeply next to him. He looked down and noticed he was covered in sweat and still had a partial erection, not well hidden under his pajama bottoms.

"Oh come on, not again..." he said to himself as he wiped a drop of sweat from his forehead and tried to even his breathing and tidy up his appearance a little, while a second knock on the door came.

"Yeah, come in" he said as calmly as he could and the door opened to reveal his godfather, who was coming to get him for their morning jog.

"Good morning Yuuri, how did you sleep?" he asked with his trademark smile, apparently not noticing Yuuri's abnormal disheveled and flustered state, or just choosing to ignore it. And also ignoring how his simple question had evidently troubled him.

"Very well… thanks…" Yuuri answered while looking away and trying to erase the memories of yet another sexual dream about Wolfram. "Conrad, I don't feel like working out today so I'll just take a bath and meet you for breakfast" he added, trying to sound nonchalant about it and hoping Conrad didn't find it suspicious that he hadn't gotten up from the bed, or from under the sheets really, to greet him.

Conrad just made a small bow as a response and turned around to leave, but Yuuri was almost sure there was a little hint of a smirk in his godfather's usual kind smile, just before he left the room.

Yuuri then, finally out of the woods, left himself fall on the bed with a loud thump and sighed dramatically, before turning his eyes to the guy still asleep next to him. It never ceased to amaze Yuuri how Wolfram could have such cat-like reflexes and still sleep so deeply. He had probably gotten back from patrolling around four or five in the morning, so he wasn't going to wake up anytime soon.

In any case, it was a sweet sight, Wolfram was sleeping on his right side, facing Yuuri, and softly snoring. His hair was just a bit messy and a couple strands of hair were falling on his face. Yuuri reached out and placed them behind his ear, lingering just a moment, to softly run his fingers through them.

To confront the image in front of him with the image in his dreams was… troubling, to say the least. Yuuri rolled his eyes in annoyance with himself and finally got up to go to the royal bathroom and hopefully ease his mind, and his hormones, before starting the day.

He was only able to relax once he was under the water up to his neck. He felt exhausted even though he now realized he had, in fact, slept through most of the night. But who could get rest from that kind of dream?

This kind of thing had been happening more and more often with the years, the first time he had been so scared when waking up, he had actually kicked Wolfram off the bed with his sudden jump, which was a novelty, it was usually the other way around. Thankfully the blond had been so annoyed with the sudden disturbance of his sleep, he hadn't noticed how strangely Yuuri must surely had behaved. And that was because the dreams felt just so infuriatingly real! Distinguishing from dream and reality was almost impossible the first couple of seconds after waking up.

To add to that, he had also woken up in some sort of hug or embrace with the blond, more times that he could remember. Although, puzzling enough, he never dreamt _that_ kind of dream in the nights when he hugged Wolfram, or when Wolfram hugged him, unconsciously on their sleep. Well, at least he knew he was doing it unconsciously, there was no way of knowing what Wolfram knew about it, but Yuuri had a feeling Wolf wasn't doing it on purpose.

On the one hand, since Yuuri always woke up before the blond, he was always able to get himself out of the embrace before Wolfram had a chance to know. And also, Wolfram had been quite distant with him lately, more and more so in the last year, so it was doubtful he would hug him at will.

No, distant wasn't the word, he was just… Yuuri couldn't quite put a word to it, but he knew what Murata meant when he said he was losing Wolfram yesterday. Wolf was still there, but inside he was slowly drifting away.

It was a bit hard to calculate exactly how long Yuuri had been engaged to Wolfram, trying to take into account both the time in Shin Makoku and on Earth, but one thing was sure, it had been longer for the blond.

Before time started to pass faster and faster on Earth while he was gone, the first Earthen year since Yuuri was first transported was actually a little more than twenty months in Shin Makoku, so even now, at eighteen-ish years old, because that was also hard to calculate, Yuuri was about to graduate high school, almost six years had passed in Shin Makoku, whereas on Earth they were only a little less than three. And Yuuri had experienced only about four of those… It was a riddle all right…

But the thing was, Wolfram ought to be getting restless and impatient, and it was completely understandable if he was. In all of Shin Makoku, and even in other countries, Wolfram had become a laughing stock, a punchline even. Yuuri had only been aware of that for the last year, much to his shame, but apparently it had been that way ever since the beginning. The way Yuuri had treated the engagement as accidental, even though it was, and not really addressed it properly since the beginning, made everyone look at Wolfram with mockery and pity, he was regarded by many as no more than an unwanted toy the Maou kept around simply out of obligation to decorum.

The whole situation was very vexing for Yuuri, he was frustrated and angry, with those who spoke so lowly of Wolfram and with himself, for giving them the tools to do so. But Wolf, however, seemed unaffected by these rumors, or at least he didn't show it. Every time they attended a ball, a political meeting or any kind of social situation, Yuuri could hear the whispers directed at them and felt something creeping up his stomach, a mix of guilt and anger that threatened to get out, but Wolf would just take his arm and smile, that smile which made Yuuri sure everything was going to be okay somehow, and then walk past the gossipers with his head held high.

Well, Wolfram was born a prince, Yuuri would never behave all regal as naturally as the blond did. But he had changed over the years, he was able to act a little more like a King now. He had become used to giving speeches and mingling in social occasions, while maintaining a certain level of decorum. Thanks to that, and realizing the actual impact his actions had over people, he had been treating Wolfram like a fiancé should be treated in public, and that seemed to both please the blond and quiet the crowds.

Yuuri was also able to understand what his role actually was much better now, and he had adjusted to the responsibilities, such a signing paperwork and keeping track of the kingdom's economy.

It was a friggin lot of work actually.

And graduating highschool in between had been a nightmare, now he had a week to get as much work done as possible in Shin Makoku before going back to Earth with Murata for their final exams, and they would finally be free!

Actually, both him and Murata had taken the courses to prepare for national admission exams to be able to pursue higher education, but he wasn't sure if he wanted to. He wanted to study something useful to his role as King, maybe economy, so that he could catch up to his retainers and really help his country at the best of his abilities, but if managing school and Shin Makoku had been hard, he could only imagine how it would be with university.

Yuuri felt a chill on his back, he had been so lost in his thoughts the water was starting to get cold and he still hadn't even scrub himself properly.

He had to snap out of it! His head, heart and body were in a turmoil. He got out of the tub and poured on his hands some greenish soap he found nearby, to then scrub his whole body with maybe a little too much force. He felt dirty, his mind was definitely dirty to be having those dreams. Even if he had started treating Wolfram more properly as a fiancé, they hadn't yet talked about their relationship, not seriously, and they hadn't had any kind of skinship beyond that of friends. All of that because he had been always so adamant on saying two guys couldn't be together, Wolfram had probably assumed it would never happen and had given up years ago. Yuuri knew Wolfram loved him at some point, but he wasn't sure if he loved him still, or if he stayed because he had no other choice.

That last thought made him feel even colder than the water he was pouring on himself to wash off the soap.

When he finally got out of the baths and got dressed, it was too late to join the rest at breakfast, so he just asked for a cup of coffee to be brought up to his office and started to go over the two large stacks of paperwork that were waiting for his approval or dismissal. He felt quite proud of how he had learned to read the mazoku language fluently in such a short period of time, necessity was, after all, the best motivation.

He had also started to differentiate the spoken language around the second year after he first arrived to Shin Makoku. The way the memories of the tongue had been waked on his soul at that time, made it so that everyone sounded like they were speaking japanese to him for a very long time, but somewhere along the way, the effects of that first experience wore off, and he had found himself talking fluently in a language that wasn't his own. It had been really creepy at first, but then he realized it was quite useful, specially to discuss things with Murata in japanese, while on Shin Makoku, so that no one around them would understand them, or the other way around, when they were on Earth.

There had been a mild side effect to that though, Wolfram had been so annoyed about the two of them talking in a language only they understood in front of him, that he had decided to learn japanese, and Murata, for some reason, had been more than happy to teach him. It had actually amazed Yuuri how fast the blond learned; japanese was not such a hard language to speak, but it was certainly a pain in the ass to read or write, even for born japanese people. Yuuri would have liked to be the one to teach him, but if baseball wasn't the subject he honestly wasn't a good teacher.

Yuuri paused for a moment to rest his eyes, he was almost halfway through the first pile of papers and his head was starting to hurt, skipping breakfast probably hadn't been a good idea, he was feeling a little nauseous.

The door suddenly opened and Yuuri didn't need to look to know who it was, only one person would just come into his office without knocking on the door first.

"Hi Wolf" he said without looking up from the paper that was currently in front of him.

"So here's where you've been all morning" Wolfram hissed, walking around the big wooden desk, to then half sit on top of it, effectively drawing Yuuri's attention, who then moved his eyes slowly from the paper, to the muscular legs in blue uniform, and then made his way up to Wolfram's face.

"Well, I have a lot of backed up work, and I'm sure Gwendal has at least five more piles waiting somewhere" Yuuri answered, trying to conceal his interest on the other guy's legs, and mentally slapping away the burning desire to put his hand on them.

"You could've woken me up this morning at least, I haven't seen you in weeks" Wolfram said with his usual scoff, although it sounded a bit fake to Yuuri for some reason, lately it always did.

"You looked cute sleeping so I didn't want to disturb you" he said, smiling and trying to sound aloof. Wolfram blushed a little and then cleared his throat, Yuuri had realized a while ago, that was the more effective way of dealing with the blond's temper, and he wasn't lying either so what could be the harm?

Well, deep inside he knew what the harm was, this undefined, and more than a bit twisted relationship they had built over the years, hurt Wolfram and it hurt himself, and he knew that, but he had been too much of a coward to take them any further, at least until now, he had made a decision yesterday with the help of his friend, having a strategist as a best friend was useful in more ways than one.

"Anyway... " Wolfram said, bringing Yuuri back to reality "I came to see if you wanted to have lunch in the gardens with Greta and I, she is preparing a picnic basket with the maids to welcome you back, since you did not come to breakfast" Wolfram gave him a scolding tone before smiling softly, Greta always made him smile like that.

"Sure! Let's go" Yuuri said and stood up to grab Wolfram's hand and led him outside, before the blond had a chance to react.

 **-.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.-**

Yuuri was walking to his and Wolfram's shared bedroom. After having lunch in the gardens Wolfram had gone to do some of his own paperwork and Yuuri had a sparring session with Conrad, he was getting decent at it, to his pride and surprise, and then he had been in a meeting with Gwendal, Günter and Murata for the rest of the day, to discuss the latest reports of the allied countries of the kingdom. Before they realized, it was dark and they had missed dinner. He really needed to stop skipping meals like that or his health would suffer soon enough.

Yuuri could notice the surprise of his retainers when he made valid and well thought observations still to that day. He had grown and matured and it was something they appreciated, but still found hard to believe understood them, after all, when he first arrived to Shin Makoku and was told he was a demon and a king all of a sudden, he was ill prepared and not even close to ready to assume such a responsibility.

But he had made a decision to stay and give it his best, to stop treating it like this was only a secondary life or a role playing game, when he decided to live as a mazoku and to permanently become the Maou on his sixteenth birthday.

Now, there were also other aspects of the Shin Makoku way of life with which he had a harder time coming to terms. One of them he had to face right now, before it was too late.

When he opened the mahogany double doors of the royal chambers he found Wolfram was already in bed, reading some book.

"No patrol duty today?" he asked nervously, as he walked to the closet to change into his pajamas. He already knew the answer, but he needed time to build up the courage to have an actual conversation with Wolfram.

"We've been patrolling for two weeks and nothing has happened, Aniue thought it was enough, although I'm still a bit restless" Wolfram answered in a serious tone, without taking his eyes away from the book.

"I see" Yuuri muttered as he finished buttoning his pajama top and walked closer to the bed. He stood in front of Wolfram for a moment before the blond realized he hadn't gone to his side.

"Yuuri, is something wrong?" Wolfram asked, probably noticing the mix of emotions currently on Yuuri's face.

"Wolf, we need to talk" had he seriously used such a cliché line just then? Wolfram was surely imagining a break up right then and there, his emerald eyes locked on his with a mixture of fear and acceptance written all over them.

Yuuri took a deep breath and added "about our engagement"

It was like he had stricken Wolfram with a baseball bat right in the gut. Yuuri noticed a small and silent gasp on the blond's lips before he looked down and placed the book on the nightstand.

Yuuri sat down next to him and tried to muster the courage to start speaking again, but Wolfram began before him.

"Yuuri, I know what you are going to say, and it's okay, you don't have to worry about me" he said with a fake reassuring tone that even Yuuri didn't miss. "I know this engagement was an accident from the start and that you could never see me as a potential partner… I just..."

And then Wolfram shut up, or more precisely he was shut up by a set of trembling lips pressed on his. He had been speaking with so much sadness and surrender Yuuri couldn't take it anymore, this wasn't how he wanted this conversation to be, so he had kissed him, with all the courage he could find within him, and not really realizing what he was doing, until he pulled away.

"What the f…" Wolfram muttered and stared at Yuuri. with the most blatant disbelief.

"That's not what I wanted to say Wolf" Yuuri said, his voice was cracking, his hands were shaking, his whole body felt like gelatin. He couldn't believe he had just done that and now he had to actually explain himself, because clearly Wolfram was in such a state of shock he wasn't going to say anything else.

"Wolf… I…" Yuuri couldn't find the words, he had been rehearsing what he was going to say all afternoon inside his head, but now he was paralyzed, he hated himself for it but he was so scared his chest hurt. He was afraid of either outcome of this conversation, whether Wolfram rejected him and broke his heart, or accepted him and thus began a way of life he had been taught was wrong… He didn't know what to do.

He felt a hand placed on top of his, realizing then that he was clenching his fists with so much force, his knuckles were white. He looked up and found Wolfram's gaze. He looked worried but reassuring and he was smiling, a soft and gentle smile, that urged him to continue.

"This engagement was an accident, yes. But the way I feel about you… Wolf, I'm not ready to get married yet, and I realize is selfish to ask you to wait even more…" Yuuri swallowed trying to ease the knot that was forming in his throat. "I know that I've always told you that two men can't be together, and I know you don't understand this, but that was the way my world taught me things should be, I just couldn't accept it, I... I couldn't accept myself" he had to stop as the tears he was fighting so hard to hold back, turned into a loud sob.

Yuuri hid his face with both hands as the sobs became louder and his shoulders began shaking. He didn't want this, he didn't want to cry, he wanted to convey his feelings to Wolfram with a smile, but he just couldn't, he hated himself so much, for so many reasons.

He was startled when he felt Wolfram embracing him from the side, he stiffened to the touch, but then let his shoulders fall, and buried his face on Wolfram's chest, letting his scent calm him as the blond made soothing hushes while stroking his hair.

"Wolf, would you stay with me? I'm sure I'm not going to be very good at this from the start… and I really don't know why you would want to be with someone like me, but if it's not too late… would you stay with me?" he asked once he had somewhat calmed his breathing. Wolfram gently pushed him away from the embrace so that he could see his face, and Yuuri felt embarrassed for a moment, to be seen in such a state.

Wolfram's eyes showed unshed tears threatening to fall also, but he was smiling. He lovingly ran his fingers through Yuuri's hair like he was the most precious thing in the world, and for a moment Yuuri's fears washed away completely.

"Of course I will" Wolfram said with a small and sweet chuckle. "I really don't understand why you are so afraid Yuuri, but I'm here for you, I will be your strength until you can find your own" he added, with love and determination in his voice. That was one of the reasons Yuuri had fallen for the blond on the first place, Wolfram made him feel safe and flustered at the same time, he was so determined and stubborn, so beautiful and yet so strong.

Before he realized what he was doing, Yuuri was kissing Wolfram again. Their lips met slowly and Yuuri's right hand traveled doubtingly to place itself in the base of Wolfram's nape, while Wolfram held him by the waist with both hands. It was a short, soft and gentle kiss, not like the ones they had shared in his dreams, but all the more sweet and absolutely perfect, even in its initial clumsiness

When they broke apart they looked at each other for a moment and then they both chuckled. Maybe this wasn't how Yuuri had imagined their first kiss would be, but he was happy.

"I did this all backwards" he whispered to himself and received a soft _hmm?_ from Wolfram in return. Yuuri took a deep breath and looked firmly into emerald eyes that suddenly looked back at him with a bit of surprise in them, he was surely making a weird face, but whatever, now or never…

"I love you Wolf" he breathed, with no little fear in his faint voice.

For a moment Wolfram only stared, searching his eyes for any trace of doubt of lies, and apparently didn't find any, as his features slowly went back to form a smile and his eyes watered.

"I love you too, Yuuri" he said back while a single tear ran down his face and then he threw himself into Yuuri's arms, who couldn't distinguish if Wolfram was crying on his shoulder, laughing of both, he just ran his fingers through golden locks of hair and let his mind wander off.

Yuuri felt so much weight had been lifted from his shoulders, he actually felt lighter, how long had it been since he breathed with such ease? How long had he been torturing himself? This feeling of happiness, these feelings of love were what he was so afraid of all this time?

Maybe, just maybe, was it really okay to love another man?

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Okay guys, this is going to be a multi chapter story after all, I have a lot of ideas I want to put into this plot, it's not just going to be _Oh, Yuuri confessed and now they'll live happily ever after!_ or that kind of stuff, as I said earlier I wish to explore their relationship and, more specifically, Yuuri's feeling towards himself as a gay man, a little more deeply than I had so far in other stories.

I really want to know what you think of this little experiment of mine, so please leave a review.


	3. Not a Choice

_Not a Choice_

Wolfram had been walking on clouds for five days, he felt lighter than he had felt in years, he hadn't really realized how bitter he was becoming on the inside until Yuuri had said those three magical words to change both their lives forever.

He had never been the kind to whine and cry when it came to his real, deeper feelings; even if he would admittedly throw a tantrum or two when it came to more superficial stuff, and even that, he rarely ever did anymore. So, without realizing it, or really intending to do it, he had let the years of unfulfilled engagement pass him by and he had settled for what he could get out of Yuuri, with no little pain.

Slowly he noticed himself changing, having to fake his own usual personality for Yuuri's sake, or maybe for his own pride's sake.

Thinking about it, he agreed with Yuuri, their engagement **had** been accidental and unwanted for both of them, in that moment he would have rather die than to be tied with such a filthy half human… well, those thought embarrassed him now. But what he felt for that wide eyed boy, who came su suddenly into his life, changed over time.

When he lost that first duel to Yuuri he was conflicted, on the one hand, Yuuri was gorgeous, he was not blind to that even when he still hated him, and he had been smitten by the show of power in that duel, but he still didn't feel anything else than just attraction and interest for this weird character who was supposed to be the new Maou. He had chosen to stay because of his pride and also, maybe mostly, because of his curiosity.

Much in the way Wolfram imagined it had been for Yuuri, although at a much faster pace, for him, feelings of friendship came first and were then followed by those of love. And the more Wolfram loved Yuuri, the more it weighed on him that their relationship would probably never change.

For some reason Yuuri has always been fixated on the notion that two men could not be together as a couple, which was so nonsensical Wolfram thought Yuuri was just making things up to get rid of him at first, but after some time he came to understand that this restriction was something of a tradition on Earth. But even if that was the case, they weren't going to get married on Earth but on Shin Makoku, where there were no laws against it, so he really didn't understand Yuuri's reservations all that well.

Even at the moment Yuuri had finally confessed, he had seemed so scared and fragile, like he was going to be punished for loving him, and that saddened Wolfram a little, but mostly, it had awoken a different kind of feeling in him, protectiveness and determination. He had made a vow years ago, to himself and to Yuuri, he would always be there for his King no matter what, his marioku would be the fire to light his way, and his body would be the sword to protect his life, but this was a little different from that.

Now that they were together, actually together, Wolfram would also be the strength Yuuri did not have in himself, for his own happiness. He was going to guide and support him, not just as a loyal soldier, but as a caring lover. If Yuuri was afraid, he would protect him, even if this threat was only in his own head, Wolfram would hold him and make him feel safe.

"Lord von Bielefeld, you look like you're a million miles away" Wolfram was brought back from his thoughts, and to the ground, so suddenly that he almost lost his balance, even though he hadn't move. The Sage was standing next to him with his hands behind his back, and was looking at him with a mischievous expression. That weird man probably already knew all of the latest developments in his personal life from Yuuri's mouth, and that made Wolfram incredibly uncomfortable.

"Geika, good morning" He answered trying to sound unaffected, while focusing his eyes on Yuuri, who was saying his last goodbyes to Conrart, as the two of them waited next to the fountain in Shinou's temple. How long had they been talking already? Normally, he would have felt a pang of jealousy at the scene, but now he really didn't care, he knew Yuuri was his, and that was just so utterly sweet. He had decided to still nag Yuuri about it sometimes, just for the kicks.

"I wanted to tell you, since this is going to be a long stay on Earth and we will probably have to interact socially there, please just call me Murata" he said smiling. That was true, they were going to stay there for at least three weeks, it was the longest Wolfram would be on Earth without a specific goal that needed his presence there. He had actually been surprised when Yuuri invited him, even with them being together as a couple now, Yuuri had always had reservations about bringing him along to Earth, like he was shielding him from something, or maybe himself.

"And also, I hope it doesn't bother you, but I'll be dropping the _lord_ and the _von_ from your name as well, your name draws way too much attention as it is" he added laughing, when Yuuri finally started walking in their direction.

"I don't mind, Murata" Wolfram answered coldly, the Sage really creeped him out for some reason. Being around him felt like being with someone who has read your personal diary without your permission, or something like that.

"You ready guys?" Yuuri asked with a bright smile

"I never thought I'd see you so happy to go take a math exam Shibuya" Murata said and effectively erased Yuuri's smile, who walked closer and placed a hand on his shoulder with a grim expression.

"You're a sadist, you know?" Yuuri said with a dramatic sigh, and they both laughed.

Wolfram sometimes wished he and Yuuri could understand each other they way that those two did. When Yuuri and Murata talked, even their tones of voice changed, they understood each other on a different level, that wasn't at Wolfram's reach. But he understood why, a lover is not the same as a friend, and the fact of that difference being there for so long, only further affirmed his belief of Yuuri having fallen in love with him long ago. That was a nice thought, confirmed when Yuuri reached for his hand to jump into the water and his expression changed immediately from laughter to a soft and caring smile.

Yes, Wolfram didn't have any doubts, or at least, not objectively, Yuuri really loved him. And with that thought in mind, he jumped.

When they emerged at the always filled tub in the Shibuya household, they were surprised by the lack of screaming and the fact of actually having time to untangle themselves before somebody popping in to greet them.

"That's weird, mum must be out" Yuuri said and handed a towel to each of them.

"That's a shame, I wanted to talk to mama-san before going" Murata answered with a pout "My clothes are on the same drawer?" he asked.

"I guess" Yuuri said while trying to get some water out of his left ear.

"I'll go change first, then" he said and exited the small bathroom.

Wolfram felt a little jealous to know the Sage had a drawer for himself in Yuuri's bedroom, but it was to be expected.

"Oh Wolf, I'm sorry! We were talking in japanese weren't we? Did you bring the earpiece?" Yuuri asked in makokuan, referring to Anissina's invention that allowed them to understand and speak the earthen language.

"I did, but I want to use this opportunity to practice, so I don't intend to use it unless we go out" he answered in what he thought was perfect japanese, but got a little laugh in return, from Yuuri.

"I like your accent" he said, was he trying to mock him? But then he leaned closed and put some strands of his wet hair behind his ear. "It's kinda sexy" he purred.

Oh… that was interesting to know…

"Okay guys I'm leaving! I'll see you tomorrow after school Shibuya!" they heard Murata yell and then the sound of the front door closing.

"That was fast" Wolfram thought out loud.

"Yeah, I think he promised to take his little sister out today" Yuuri answered and offered his hand to lead them to his room in the second floor. Wolfram often forgot that the Sage had a family and a personal life back on Earth, he was always so reserved and secretive, it was hard to imagine him leading a normal life anywhere, except sometimes when he was talking to Yuuri.

After they changed clothes and dried their hair, Wolfram took notice of the time, the little digital clock on Yuuri's room marked eleven o'clock in the morning, so Miko-san was probably out buying groceries and the Shibuya older men were at work.

"Are you missing school today?" Wolfram asked while taking in the now familiar scenery.

"Yeah, I thought we would get here on sunday night, but apparently it's monday morning already. I still can't get the time difference right" he said and walked to the desk on the other side of the room to grab a small calendar. "My first exam is on wednesday, but I have a mock test for the national exams tomorrow" he added with a heavy voice.

Wolfram stood up from the bed and placed himself behind Yuuri to massage his shoulders gently, he had been pretty tense since he got back to Shin Makoku, about this exams and having to get as much work done as possible there before coming back here. Only recently Wolfram had fully understood how hard the former wimp actually worked to be able to keep up with both worlds, not that Wolfram would ever tell him he didn't consider him a wimp anymore.

Yuuri leaned into his touch and relaxed, letting out a couple happy whimpers.

"Wolf I'm sorry, I dragged you all the way here, but now I really need to study" he said with a tone that meant he really didn't want to study, which made Wolfram chuckle, with only a little insistence, he probably would have convinced Yuuri to do other, more fun, activities than study, but he wasn't the kind of man who would keep his lover from his responsibilities, or at least, not right now.

"I know wimp" he said and gave Yuuri a peck on the cheek before walking to the door and heading down stairs.

When Miko-san arrived, nearly an hour later, he was reading what people on Earth called a magazine, he had found a whole stash of them near the couch on the living room, and after borrowing a dictionary from Yuuri, he had devoted himself to the task of trying to understand the thing.

Japanese writing was complicated, they had one type or logographic writing and two other syllabary alphabets, but they had the same notion of _the_ _spirit of the word_ that in Shin Makoku's writing, so it hadn't been that hard for Wolfram to learn the basics. He really wanted to be able to understand Yuuri's language and to share that with him, he wanted to make an effort, just like Yuuri had to with theirs, it seemed unfair somehow if he didn't.

Miko-san had been happy to see him, as always, she was so warm and caring, the first time he met her he understood, partly, why Yuuri was the way he was, why he saw all people as equals. Her full acceptance of their relationship from the start made it even harder for Wolfram to understand exactly why Yuuri was so adamant on saying people of the same gender weren't supposed to be together on Earth.

Yuuri's father and brother weren't going to be home until dinner, so he had lunch alone with Miko-san, who took up a tray of food for Yuuri to eat while he studied. She offered to take Wolfram shopping in two days, since he was going to be staying for three weeks and most of Yuuri's clothes were too big on him since the wimp had outgrown him last year. He felt a bit guilty accepting, but Miko-san seemed so excited he couldn't do otherwise.

Hours flew by as they talked about everything they could think of, well, everything other that the most recent development in his and Yuuri's relationship. For some reason Wolfram felt Yuuri would want to tell her that himself, so he bit his tongue and limited himself to talking about Greta and the rest of his family back in Shin Makoku. Apparently, Shouri had recently started working in politics, although Wolfram wasn't sure if he actually understood what Miko was telling him, the government of Japan was completely different than on Shin Makoku, and she was using a lot of japanese words he still didn't understand. Because of this, much to his embarrassment, he decided to use the earpiece at dinner that night, even though he had decided to only use it outside, he had a feeling he wouldn't want to miss anything of that particular conversation.

"Yuuri, dinner's almost ready and I think your father and brother are pulling in the driveway as we speak" Wolfram said, startling Yuuri, who hadn't notice his presence.

"How long have you been here?" he asked, looking at him like he was a mirage of some sort.

"I just came in. Really, it amazes me how focused you can actually get when you put an effort" he said in a fake mocking tone and then walked over to him and sat on his lap. Being able to have this kind of skinship with the man he loved was something he never would have thought possible until so recently, and he loved how Yuuri would get startled every single time, but accept him anyway.

"Are you nervous?" He asked, joining their foreheads together.

"A little… After this exams are done, it's all over… It's hard to come to terms with" Yuuri answered with a forced cheerful smile. Until that point, he had been hiding to some extent, behind the fact of him still being just a student. Once he graduated high school and took the national exams, he would become, for all intents and purposes, an adult, and he also had to decide if he would actually enter higher education or not.

Wolfram only responded with a soft "Hmm" and stayed in position. There wasn't much he could say, he knew Yuuri didn't need or want any kind of advice or encouragement, just being there to hold his hand or help him up if he fell, that was the only role he could take at this time, and Yuuri seemed pleased with just that.

Their eyes met and they both smiled, Wolfram leaned in, wanting to steal even a short kiss before they were called down for dinner, but just as he did, they heard the front door closing and Shouma's voice greeting his wife.

"We should go" Yuuri said, looking down, trying to hide how blushed his face was. He still couldn't get used to this, he was relieved they were taking thing slowly, he didn't know if he was mentally prepared to go all the way with Wolfram just yet, but at the same time his body didn't agree with that in the least, and keeping his sanity when Wolfram kissed him was proving to be damn hard.

After exchanging the usual pleasantries, they found themselves sitting at the dinner table, which was unusually silent. The Shibuya older men were talking about something or other in a low voice and the rest just ate in silence. That made Wolfram uneasy for some reason, but he shrugged it off at best he could, and tried to enjoy Miko-san's curry, he had missed the flavour without realizing it.

"So!" Everyone turned their heads over to the only woman at the table, who had rose her voice suddenly. "Yuu-chan! Tell me, how long has it been since you and Wolf-chan became an official couple then?" she asked smiling a bit deviously.

A row of gasps were heard in no particular order. Yuuri turned to Wolfram, shooting daggers at him with his eyes. Wolfram responded only with a look of disbelief that somehow said he truly hadn't been the culprit of this breach of information.

"Well? Yuu-chan? You know, papa and mama were getting worried about you two, so tell me, can I be at ease now? Did you finally confess?" She said in only one breath and with sparkling eyes.

Suddenly, all eyes were on Yuuri, who was trying to finish swallowing the spoonful of food he had put in his mouth before the outburst, and that was currently threatening with asphyxiating him.

"Son?" Shouma said with concern and maybe a bit of curiosity.

"A… about… about a week ago…" Yuuri finally managed to speak, looking first at Wolfram and then down to his plate.

Meanwhile, Wolfram felt all his blood rushing up to his head, he was probably beat red and felt like he could faint at any moment, but he was far more concerned for Yuuri, so he took a deep breath and reminded himself of the strength of his own will.

"Mother, father, even though Yuuri and I have been engaged all this time, you knew that it was accidental, and because of that, you probably thought someday it would just come to a natural end, and Yuuri would find someone more suited for him…" He paused and reassured Yuuri, who was looking at him wide eyed, with a soft smile. "However, I have been honoured to receive your son's feelings, and I intend to fulfill your expectations as well, from now on" he finished and took a sip of water, his throat felt dry, that had been harder to get out than he had expected.

"Oh my…" Miko said softly, partly covering her mouth with one hand. "Honey, you don't have to worry about that… we're happy for the both of you" She said warmly, and only then Yuuri dared to look her in the eye again.

"It´s true that we knew this was an accident to begin with, and it certainly isn't what we had pictured, but that doesn't matter" Shouma added, taking his wife's hand. "If this is what you have decided, we will support you Yuuri"

Yuuri's relief was cut short by the sound of Shouri clicking his tongue at that last remark, but after receiving a menacing look from his mother, he said nothing.

"Now, let's just finish our dinner so you can get back to those books! Remember, this is the last stretch, you can't slack off!" Shouma said and winked with a broad smile.

Dinner finished just like that, not another mention of the subject, although Wolfram could tell there was something strange in the air for the rest of the evening. Once they were done, Yuuri said he would continue studying for a while and handed Wolfram a towel and a set of pajamas so he could take a shower before going to bed.

Wolfram obeyed and took his sweet time doing so, he needed to calm his nerves. It was true that he had already introduced himself to his future in laws, as his son's fiance, but this experience had been far more nerve wracking, even though it had apparently worked out just fine. At some point, Yuuri's fear of rejection for their same sex relationship had gotten into his head, and he had been expecting a very different outcome, but now it was done and it was fine.

He walked happily to Yuuri's bedroom, eager to hug him tightly and utter a well deserved _I told you so_ to his stubborn lover, but when he reached the door, he found the room to be empty.

That was odd, he was sure the lights on the first floor were all turned off, where could Yuuri be? Then he heard a muffled scream, coming for further down the corridor. On instinct, he hurried in the direction of the noise and found himself outside of Shouri's room. The door was left ajar, and the light was on.

"Just what the hell is wrong with you Shouri!?" It was Yuuri's voice, he sounded really upset.

"You know damn well what's wrong with me Yuuri, what are you thinking, for God's sake!?" They were both clearly in the middle of a fight, and Wolfram knew better than to get involved, so he turned his back and started to walk away, but then…

"Do you have anything against Wolfram!?" The sudden mention of his name, by Yuuri, stopped him in his tracks. They were arguing about him.

"There's nothing wrong with him, you know that's not the problem…" Shouri answered in a calmer voice. "Yuuri… this kind of relationship is not natural. I always thought you were just going along with it because you didn't have the backbone to reject him… but now you're saying that you actually want this?"

"I do…" Yuuri didn't sound hesitant at all, but maybe a little sad. Wolfram felt conflicted, he probably shouldn't be listening to this, but he was unable to move away.

"You have to think this through Yuuri… You still can back away from this and have a proper relationship, with a nice girl who can give you children, you have to think about your position" Shouri said and there was a long pause after that… Wolfram felt hurt, he knew his limitations as a male, and he was sure Yuuri knew them too, but still…

"There are other ways to have children Shouri" Yuuri said, his voice getting angrier again.

"Yuu-chan… you are just confused because of all the time you have spent together" Shouri sounded a bit condescendent, but concerned still, that made Wolfram's blood turn cold for some reason. "If you think about it properly, you'll realize…"

"No!" Yuuri cut him off with a pretty loud voice. "I'm not confused and I have thought this through already! Do you think I chose this? Do you think I chose to be like this!?" Yuuri sounded like he was about to cry and even though Wolfram didn't understand exactly why, he felt he could cry too.

"Shouri, even if it wasn't Wolfram, I probably couldn't live the life you want me to, and there's nothing I can do to change that… Mom and dad are okay with it, why can't you? I'm not a kid anymore!" Wolfram was sure now that Yuuri was at the verge of tears and he felt utterly powerless, the thin wooden door that separated them might as well had been an iron wall.

"Exactly Yuuri! You're not a kid anymore! You have to think like an adult and make the right decision!"

"This. Is. Not. A. Decision. Shouri" Yuuri said, putting emphasis into every word as if trying to make a point Wolfram wasn't able to distinguish. "The only decision I make is whether I choose to be happy, or live my life lying, and I'm tired of lying…" Wolfram heard steps coming closer to the door and took a step back.

"You can either support me… or keep your opinion to yourself…"

Wolfram ran. Quietly but swiftly, to Yuuri's room. He quickly turned off the light and got in bed, facing the wall. His heart was beating fast, and his emotions were swirling inside him. What was that conversation!? What was the problem if it wasn't him? Just because he couldn't bear children for Yuuri? Even though they could adopt? Why was Shouri hurting Yuuri like that… even though his voice truly seemed to show concern… Just what the fuck was happening?

Even though he had ran thinking Yuuri would come right after him, it took a couple of minutes for him to enter the bedroom. Giving Wolfram enough time to steady his heart and breathing.

When he heard the sound of the door opening he just stayed still, he didn't know how to face Yuuri after having heard what clearly was a very private argument.

He was very aware of every sound and movement Yuuri made in the dark, he could hear the rustling of clothes and the heavy but quiet breathing that every so often resembled a sigh. Then he felt the weight of Yuuri body on the mattress next to him, sitting with his back to him and his feet still on the ground. He wanted to talk, let Yuuri know he was awake, but he was afraid that if he did, Yuuri would force himself to smile, and he didn't want that.

Suddenly he felt fingers running through his hair, he didn't move a single inch, but his heart stopped for a moment. Yuuri sighed again, this time much more loudly, and then laid on the bed, facing on the opposite direction.

A couple of minutes passed by, Wolfram wondered if maybe he should just try to sleep and forget about this for now, since Yuuri probably wanted to do just that, but then a small, muffled sound broke the deafening silence that drowned the room until then. Wolfram stopped breathing for a moment, concentrating all his senses, and then realised a soft movement coming from next to him. Yuuri was, very quietly, crying…

Before he had time to think about what he was doing, he turned around and hugged his lover's back. Yuuri stiffened, and the soft whimpers stopped, making Wolfram wonder if maybe he had made the wrong choice, but there was no backing down now, so he just tightened his embrace and buried his head in Yuuri's back.

Before long, the whimpers started again, Yuuri grabbed Wolfram's arm and curled up his legs. Wolfram said nothing, he only held him tighter while Yuuri's voice grew louder and his tears turned into sobs.

Wolfram wanted to understand, but he didn't, and because he didn't, this was all he could do, and he prayed it was enough all through that painful night. Even after Yuuri had cried himself to sleep, for Wolfram, it was a sleepless night, feeling as though he had to guard the sacred sleep of the man in his arms, who even being taller than him, at that moment felt, so, so painfully small.

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 **AN:** Okay so… I'm back… It's been half a year since my last update and I'm very sorry for that. On the bright side, I finally finished my thesis and got my degree this past December! So I'm gonna have more time to write now.

To all the Shouri fans out there, I'm sorry I made him into such an asshole in this chapter. Thinking about it, I believe this was a very plausible reaction for him to have, he has an obvious brother complex and he is truly concerned about his little brother's future, although in this case, that concern made him into an asshole.

Please leave a review, I'd love it if you can give me some pointers about where you would like this story to go from here. Yuuri's probably going to suffer a bit more before he can reach full acceptance of himself, but well, we'll see what happens.


	4. Coming out

**Important! Please read:** Okay guys, so, as I said when I started this fic, I've taken some liberties in regards of time and time perception, in order to create a timeline that made sense and brought the characters to a specific date in the present (which is now the past, since I started this last year). I did this for a single reason that you will understand when you read the following two chapters. One of the liberties that I'm taking is changing the actual academic calendar of Japan, which runs from April to early March even, and adjusting it to the american and english one, which runs from September to late June, early July. Because of this, Yuuri would be graduating high school in June 2016. I've also taken some liberties regarding the method for Japanese universities selection process, or more specifically, the dates for the test required for such selection, taking into account the changes in the academic schedule I made.

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* * *

 _Coming out_

"Honey do you have everything you need? Did you sleep well? Are you sure you don't want anything else to eat?" Miko asked, in the verge of hyperventilating, as she watched her not so little boy anymore, put on his shoes and grab his backpack.

"Mom, relax, I'm fine, I have everything I need and I seriously can't eat anything else" Yuuri answered, still feeling stuffed up to his ears with food. Miko had actually cooked a full traditional japanese breakfast that morning, and hadn't let him leave the table until he ate enough for at least three adult males.

"Dear, I really think you should drive Yuu-chan to the test taking centre. What if he gets lost or sick on the train?" She said, looking at Shouma, who had even asked permission from work to do exactly that.

"Mom, we talked about this, is only two stations away and the traffic getting there would actually be worse than taking the train" Yuuri repeated, for the eleventh time that morning. "You can all come pick me and Murata up when we're done" He said, looking at Wolfram, who was unusually quiet.

Wolfram looked up from the unspecific spot of the floor he had been staring at, up until that point, and took a deep breath before saying "Good luck…" in a small voice. Just why the hell was he so damned nervous about this national exam thing anyway? It wasn't like he was the one taking it, but he felt his heart was about to pop out of his chest for some reason, completely unbeknown to him.

"Remember to read the questions carefully before answering! You are smart, but you get too distracted!" Shouri pointed out with a bit too much enthusiasm.

"I borrowed the company's minivan, so we'll be waiting for you outside the centre, remember to call as soon as you're done" Shouma said and put a hand on Yuuri's shoulder reassuringly.

Yuuri smiled, he was happy to see his family reunited to see him off like that, how nervous they all were just proved how loved he was, although it didn't help to ease his own nervousness.

"I'll be off then"

Ken was waiting for his friend outside of the Shibuya household, he had thought about coming in to say hello, but if he did, they would probably end up being late for the exam. When he saw Yuuri coming out, he waved and guessed Yuuri had been sent off as dramatically as he had been just some minutes ago, by his own family, by the exaggerated sigh with which he had closed the door behind him.

"You ready?" he asked.

"As ready as I'll ever be".

When Yuuri was finally sitting down in front of the infamous exam, he took a moment to look around the room and calm his nerves. Everyone he saw looked really anxious, but he didn't feel like that, not at that moment anyway. He had faced so many nerve wracking situations, his life had been in danger more times that he could count in the past five years, in comparison, this was actually a very ridiculous thing to be nervous about. But more than that, he reminded himself of his chosen life, even if he failed this test miserably, and he had enough self confidence to objectively think that he wouldn't, this was only **one** option, he still hadn't even decided if he would be going to college or not.

He took a deep breath and decided to just give his best and be done with it soon. The sooner this was over, the sooner he would find a certain blond waiting for him outside the gates, the one that always made him feel everything would be okay.

With that in mind, the once excruciatingly long minutes started passing by faster, and the questions on the paper became clearer. Before he realized, the first portion of the test was over and the examiner was giving instructions about the fifteen-minute break they had, to go to the bathroom or such.

Yuuri left the auditorium that had been assigned to him and tried to find Murata on the vicinities, but he didn't seem to be anywhere in sight. His mobile phone and other belongings had been taken away at the entrance, so he couldn't call him, or any of his classmates that had been assigned that test centre as well. Fifteen minutes wasn't that long anyway, so he decided to just sit down near the door and wait, but just when he was about to do so, he felt a rather loud thump behind him, followed by some gasps and screams.

He turned around and saw a group of people gathering around a girl with a uniform he recognized as the one from Murata's high school. Instinctively, he walked towards her and kneeled down next to her.

"Are you okay? Can you stand?" He asked, the girl was conscious, but barely, and considerably pale.

Someone in the crowd said they were going to go find an examiner, or someone in charge, to ask for help.

"Please, don't, I need to finish the test or I'll lose a year… I just didn't eat breakfast and didn't sleep very well… That's all" The girl said and tried to stand, losing her balance midway and falling into Yuuri's arms, who had gotten up just in time to catch her.

Yuuri thought about it for a second, if it really was just over exhaustion, lack of food, and stress, then it would be a shame if she had to wait another year just to retake the test, after putting so much effort, to the point of fainting… well, it was a common occurrence, but she was right in front of him.

He looked around and tried to position himself in a way that the least amount of people would see what he was about to do. He looked at the girl and winked, while putting his index finger in front of his lips with his free hand, and still holding onto her back with the other.

He steadied his breath and closed his eyes for a second, and then tried to quickly concentrate his marioku on the hand that held the girl up, and to do so without the usual glow that came with it, or at least, make it as inconspicuous as possible. After the last box had been removed from Earth, it had become more difficult to use his powers there, but he could manage that much without even making an effort.

The girl's eyes widened, the color gradually coming back to her cheeks.

"What… what are you doing?" she asked, now fully supporting her own weight, but not moving away from Yuuri, who only then took a moment to take notice of the girl in his arms. She was slender and had fair, almost translucent skin, that contrasted heavily with her long black hair and dark brown eyes, she was definitely what you would call a japanese traditional beauty.

"Nothing really" he answered with a smile, just when the guys from earlier were getting back, along with a tall man of approximately forty years old.

"Mizuno-ojousama*! Are you alright!?" The man asked worriedly, running towards them. Yuuri instinctively let go of the girl and backed away a couple steps. He had grown accustomed to dealing with ladies, princesses and even queens over the years in Shin Makoku, but hearing the word ojousama somehow made him feel subconscious.

"I'm okay now… I think…" She said doubtingly, and started walking away from Yuuri. When she was a couple steps away she turned around and mouthed the words _thank you_ , before disappearing into the crowd, along with the tall man.

Yuuri could feel all eyes were on him all of a sudden, but thankfully, it was already time to get back to the auditorium, so no one really had the time to bother with him much longer, and neither did he, to bother with anything really.

The second part of the test went by as fast as did the first, and finally, the torture was over. Yuuri walked to the lockers to retrieve his belongings and, after a couple minutes, he called Murata, who told him he was waiting near the entrance.

"Yo! How was it then?" he asked once they finally managed to find each other, in the sea of different uniforms that were gathered around them.

"I'm just glad it's finally over" Yuuri answered, as he lightly massaged his own sore shoulders, he had been more tense than he had realized, and now that his body was relaxed, he felt as though a truck had ran him over. "How about you, although I feel it's kinda stupid to ask the Sage such a thing"

"Hey, you know I'm a simple high school senior, just like you" Ken said with a chuckle, although he was pretty sure he was going to get a full score. "I heard you played prince charming for a while at recess… should I tell the story to Bielefeld?" he asked mischievously, making Yuuri choke on his own saliva.

"How the hell did you find out about that?" Yuuri was amazed, the Sage really did know everything, apparently.

"Mizuno-san told me. You made quite an impression on her, she didn't know who you were, but it was pretty easy to imagine, I seriously doubt there are many more people in here with the ability to heal through touch, Shibuya" Ken's expression suddenly changed from one of playful mockery to one of seriousness. "I know you had good intentions, but if you keep using your mariouku here, you're gonna get us found out sooner or later" he added, just when they were about to reach the gates.

"I know, I won't do it anymore" Yuuri said while searching for his mobile "Don't tell Wolf, you know how he gets"

And before Ken had a chance to answer, Yuuri had already dialed his mother and taken the phone to his ear, only to abruptly push it away a second after, apparently, Miko was yelling on the other side of the line.

"They're parked just around the corner… I think I just pierced an eardrum"

Ken chuckled to himself as they made their way between the sea of people. The Shibuyas had invited him to join them on a celebratory lunch, on a very exclusive restaurant. They had been able to get a reservation thanks to Shouri's new acquired connections as assistant to the governor. His parents both worked and his sister was still at school, so he had accepted gladly. The Shibuya's had become somewhat of a second family to him over the years, and Miko was an endless source of entertainment for him, being that they shared a passion for putting Shibuya in awkward situation, albeit for different reasons.

As they were approaching the corner, Ken suddenly remembered he had seen some unread messages on his phone earlier, so he took it out to check them, and found a pleasant surprise.

"By the way, Kinou-kun sent me a message while we were taking the test, the guys want to get together tomorrow to celebrate our freedom" he said, getting Yuuri's attention back from the clouds. He had probably overworked his nerves a bit, and was now spacing out.

"Really? Why do they always contact you instead of me? You're not even officially on the team" And neither was him, actually, not anymore.

Yuuri had been the captain of the baseball team of his school ever since his second year. When he first became the Maou, he had to face a lot of hard truths about himself, in order to mature and grow as a ruler and as a person. One of those things had been facing the real reasons why he had quit baseball in the first place, and after doing so, he found a renewed passion for it. Murata had been there from the beginning as well, somehow always finding the time to come to practices and matches, and acting as an unofficial manager. Yuuri knew he was probably just trying to keep an eye on him at the beginning, but after a while, Yuuri was sure that glasses-kun** had begun to enjoy himself.

"´Cause they know you never check your phone. Anyway, he said to meet in the arcade with the baseball simulator at noon"

As Murata said that, Yuuri saw an unmistakable golden blond set of hair, partially hidden behind several girls who had gathered around Wolfram, probably in an attempt to get his phone number or email address. At that point, two thoughts went through Yuuri's mind, almost simultaneously; the first, it still amazed Yuuri how someone as beautiful and obviously popular as Wolfram had fallen for him of all people, the second, an overwhelming sense of relief, knowing Wolfram didn't have a phone number or email address to give, even if he wanted to. Recognizing such a petty thought within himself made him feel both ashamed and, if only a bit, happy. Giving himself permission to have this thoughts was in deed liberating.

This small traces of happiness grew even larger when, seeing him, Wolfram politely pushed aside the girls and ran in his direction with a smile on his face.

After some overly dramatic hugs from Miko and Shouri, they headed for the restaurant in the minivan, driven by Shouma. It was a thirty minutes drive, in which Ken and Yuuri were questioned about the exam, how they fared and just every possible question the Shibuya family and Wolfram were able to come up with. They all had obviously been more anxious than the two young man actually taking the test.

By the time they reached the restaurant, they all had gotten most of that anxiety out, so the actual lunch was pretty enjoyable. There was no mention of the dreaded question Shouri had been dying to ask for months now, were they going to continue on to higher education, or were they going to declare Shin Makoku as their permanent place of residence? Miko has instructed his oldest to stay away from the subject, and under threat of upsetting Hamano Jennifer, he bit his tongue, also considering he had upset Yuuri quite a lot already.

Shouri took a moment to take notice of the interactions between his little brother and his **male** fiance when Wolfram started to lecture Yuuri about relaxing too much in terms of etiquette at the table when they were on Earth. Shouri didn't consider himself a homophobe, or more like, he had never really been confronted with a situation that forced him to question the issue. Even though, in the bottom of his heart, he wanted to support Yuuri and he was able to recognize the struggle that it had meant for him to come to the conclusion that he had, he couldn't bring himself to accept it fully.

Since the night he had made his brother cry for the first time in almost ten years, he had made a deal with himself, he was going to **try** , he couldn't do more than that, but he was going to do it, even if he didn't agree, even if it pained him a bit, he was going to try to understand. So when he caught himself, at that moment, looking at Yuuri with disapproval written all over his face, he forced himself to look away, he breathed deeply and smiled as sincerely as he could before looking back.

Yuuri noticed, and was able to read his brother's mind almost to the letter. Even if he appreciated the sentiment behind that fake smile, it hurt him deeply to realize, once again, that his big brother would never look at him the same way that he did only less than a month ago.

Everything was changing, and there was no going back.

 **-.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.-**

The next day, both Wolfram and Yuuri overslept, they had stayed up until very late, mainly talking, but also alternating a few sessions of heavy petting here and there. Yuuri was about an inch away of losing his sanity in that respect of their relationship, but somehow they had managed to keep things pretty PG13 still.

The topics of conversation had been two, they had discussed at length about the decisions Yuuri had to take now. Even though Wolfram stated over and over again that he would support Yuuri no matter what he decided, he had been honest in saying he preferred Yuuri to continue his education in Shin Makoku. From his point of view, that way he would be instructed in matters more closely related to the kingdom itself, although he conceded that Yuuri's outside perspective had brought them great advances thus far.

The other matter had been the get together with Yuuri's former teammates. It had been clear from the start that Wolfram wanted to go, and he was going to go, whether Yuuri liked it or not, and he didn't really mind, but they had to come up with a somewhat coherent backstory to his presence, and it took a while for Yuuri to convince Wolfram of introducing him only as a friend.

Because of their late awakening, they were about twenty minutes late already, when they met up with Ken outside the station, who greeted them with a joke about the possible reasons they had stayed up so late.

"Oh, the passion of youth" he said, as mockingly as he possibly could.

"Don't talk like an old man, Murata Ken" Yuuri said and slightly punched him in the arm.

Ken loved those times when Shibuya emphasized that he was just Murata Ken for some reason, it grounded him, and it further affirmed his decision to follow and guide him, to the best of his abilities.

"So you decided to bring him huh… Showing some balls, are we?" Ken said, taking advantage of Bielefeld being distracted, looking at the different signs on the street, trying to read them.

"I didn't really have much of a choise… But, yeah, maybe…" Yuuri had planned to bring Wolfram along ever since he saw him with those girls the day before. A part of him wanted to show of Wolfram, while still keeping their relationship a secret, it was a conflicting emotion.

"Shibuya-sempai! Over here!" they heard a voice coming from the tables at the furthest end of the arcade, as soon as they walked in.

"Hi guys, sorry we're late" Yuuri said as they rushed to the table. All eyes were immediately on Wolfram, as he had expected, his features clearly drew attention in a regular japanese arcade such at that, although Yuuri believed Wolfram would stand out even in the middle of Europe.

"Guys, this is a friend of ours, from Germany… his name is Bielefeld, Wolfram Bielefeld" The conscious effort it took for him to skip the _von_ made him talk too slowly, which made the introduction a bit too dramatic.

"Wolf, this are some of my kouhai from the baseball club I told you about; Kinou, Hayga, Arata and Ryouta" he continued, trying to shake off his nervousness and pointing to each boy as he said their names.

"Nice to meet you" Wolfram said, he was wearing Anissina's earpiece, so he sounded like a born japanese.

"Oh, your japanese is pretty good Bielefeld-san, have you been here long?" Arata asked while they took their seats.

"Not really, I learned the language in the past year while I was still back home, with help from Murata, I haven't had much conversational experience until recently…" Wolfram's speech was very polite, and it contrasted heavily with that of those around him. Yuuri thought that made their story more believable.

"As expected from the Todai hopeful*** genius" Hayga said looking at Murata, they probably assumed he had been helping him through skype or something like that, because in their perception of time, it wasn't plausible for neither him, nor Yuuri, to have traveled anywhere in such short periods of time.

"Wait… does that mean Shibuya-sempai speaks german!?" Kinou asked in disbelief.

"Well, well, what's with this drilling interrogatory? Aren't we here to celebrate?" Ken said and redirected the conversation, sensing Shibuya's stress level rising with every second the conversation revolved around Bielefeld.

"That's right! How did you do on the exam? I´m sure Murata-san is expecting a full score" Kinou said as if it were the more natural thing in the world, well, they all thought the same.

After ordering something to eat and playing on the baseball simulator for a while, they went back to the table. It had been a really pleasant afternoon and Yuuri thought he had finally relaxed. Wolfram was getting along perfectly with his kouhai and their backstory had turned out to be believable, apparently.

"Shibuya-sempai has been really mean to us lately, you haven't even drop by the field once since you retired as captain! All the other sempai drop by once in awhile" Ryouta said while pouting, he was the only first year of the group, so he hadn't spent as much time with Yuuri as the rest, but because he was also a catcher, they had bonded more than the others.

"Yeah… I've been pretty busy lately…" Yuuri said guiltily. Honestly speaking, maintaining his position as captain had been almost an agonizing feat. It was one of the factors that had made him realize just how urgent it was for him to prioritise one of the two worlds fully.

"Rumour has it you got yourself a girlfriend" Hayga said and pushed him with his elbow a couple of times.

"Oh, so that's what it was" Ryouta said playfully.

Yuuri gulped down his saliva heavily, he couldn't bring himself to look, but he could pretty much guess the face Wolfram was making after hearing that innocent comment.

"Actually, a sempai told me he saw you getting pretty chummy with the famous Mizuno-chan yesterday" Hayga added, getting gasps in response from the other kouhai, it seemed everyone, except him, knew who this ojousama was.

Oh dear Shinou help me, he thought, still not daring to look at Wolfram, but distinctly feeling a somewhat murderous aura growing beside him.

"I just met her there and helped her out because she felt sick, I didn't even know her name until Murata told me afterwards" Yuuri said almost stuttering, trying to pass his fear of Wolfram's reaction for the normal shyness of a reserved japanese boy, around this kind of subject.

"Oh, that makes more sense. It sounded a bit weird that she would take interest in you sempai" Kinou said, and received nods of approval from all the present. "After all, she's not only rich, she's also a model you know? I heard she had to quit because the stalkers wouldn't leave her alone, but I still have some magazines from when she modeled for that swimming suit company" He added, with a lecherous tone.

"Yeah, such a cutie couldn't possibly go for sempai, right?" Hayga said while laughing.

The comments only seemed to aggravate Wolfram more. Yuuri was desperately trying to come up with a way to change the subject when...

"Don't be so mean guys. Actually, Mizuno-san asked me for your contact info this morning" It was Murata. Everyone seemed surprised with the fact of him actually knowing Mizuno, so their attention was focused on him for a second, giving Yuuri the chance to look at Wolfram from the corner of his eye. He was thankful they were on Earth right now and Wolfram didn't have his marioku to burn him to a crisp. His eyes told one thing and one thing only, _when we're alone, you have some explaining to do._

"Should I give it to her?" Ken added with a devious smile, he was obviously enjoying seeing their reactions, and he wasn't even trying to hide it.

"Murata…" Yuuri said in what had become known as his Maou voice. Effectively making Murata back off from the question, but it was too late.

"Sempai! This is your chance!" someone said, Yuuri wasn't sure who. Suddenly all the boys were cheering him on and he couldn't really distinguish who was saying what.

"No… I… I already have someone so…" he stuttered, unsure of how to finish the sentence.

"Really? But this is Mizuno-chan we're talking about! Maybe you should ditch her and try your luck in the major leagues, right?" Arata said, obviously jesting, but Wolfram didn't see it that way.

"Bielefeld-san don't look at him like that" Hayga said, he was the first to notice the death glares of the blond that were being directed at Yuuri, with less and less dissimulation as time went by.

"Or are you the one he's dating?"

…

…

Time suddenly seemed to stop for Yuuri. Hayga had obviously been joking, but he couldn't stop himself from reacting. This was the moment he had feared, all through the past night he had prepared himself for a way to get out of such a situation. All he had to do was go along with the joke, say something like _yeah right_ and laugh it off, or maybe even play along jokingly, like anyone would, with a close friend, in that situation.

But he couldn't, for some reason, he couldn't. He saw Wolfram's and Murata's eyes widening as he directed a fast glance at both of them to his right, before lowering his head and biting his lower lip. He couldn't speak, he found no strength in him to lie or confirm the truth, but his silence was enough of an answer in itself. The laughter died out, and the air around him felt heavy and thick. He was done for.

"Wait, what!? Seriously? I was just joking… Dude…" Hayga said and got as far away from Yuuri as he could, without standing up from his chair.

Yuuri stopped thinking altogether, his mind went blank for a couple of seconds. Then he felt something on his hand, that was resting in his lap. It was Wolfram's hand. He looked up and met the emerald eyes of the blond. In them, he saw a mixture of his lover and his loyal soldier. Wolfram was ready to follow any order he would give, he knew that look well, the one that said Wolfram would give his life for him, determination, loyalty and love.

It was a rather odd situation to show that look, Yuuri thought. But it made him understand that, by his reaction, Wolfram was assuming an attitude of response to danger, his anger from before long forgotten, only worrying about his safety. Wolfram felt they were being threatened, and he didn't want that. So he said to himself it was time to grow a pair, he held the hand that was on top of his and looked up.

"Does it bother you?" he asked, his eyes directed at those in front of him, at the moment, Arata and Ryouta.

So that confirmed it. He was probably still the same idiot he had always been. Incapable of deceit and way too trusting of others. But that was also his biggest strength. Somewhere along the way, his fear of rejection had overpowered his own nature, and it was time to change that.

"Well, it's a bit of a shock…" Arata was the first to speak. He looked more confused than anything else. He looked to his right, to Ryouta, in a silent plea for him to finish his own thought for him.

"Yeah, but, sempai is sempai, regardless of who you love, I guess" Ryouta said, with the innocence that characterized him, one of the reasons Yuuri and him had gotten along so well from the start.

"In any case, even if you were gay, never in a million years would I have thought you'd be able to score a foreign bishounen" Kinou said openly pointing at Wolfram, which made him visibly relax, and loosen his hold on Yuuri's had, that until that point was ready to grab him and run for it, if necessary.

"I mean, come on, what can we expect out of life after this?" Kinou added quite loudly, making everyone laugh.

The tension was gone, miraculously, like it was the most normal thing in the world. Everyone started drilling Wolfram with questions about how they had met and such, in an effort to embarrass Yuuri as much as possible, but also to let him know they were treating this the same as if he had just introduced them to a girlfriend.

With a few twists for credibility, Wolfram gladly told the story about how Yuuri had confessed to him the day they met, in front of his whole family, and Yuuri proceeded to awkwardly explain how it had been a misunderstanding then. In short, their usual behavior.

The rest of the outing went by much faster after that, only when Yuuri relaxed, he noticed how tense he had actually been since they had arrived to the arcade. Unconsciously measuring the distance between him and Wolfram, trying to dissimulate something that no one would've even suspected anyway. He was being too over conscious, and on some level, it made him realize that a part of him didn't want to hide his relationship at all from the start, and that was a rather surprising fact for him. Maybe Shin Makoku's way of thinking had rubbed off on him to some extent, and maybe that was a good thing.

After they separated from the rest and took the train Wolfram and Murata also relaxed. Taking notice of this made Yuuri think he was being really selfish, putting so much stress on two of the most important people for him, because of his own shortcomings. Although, thinking about it, that could apply to his entire career as Maou too. It was a depressing thing to think.

"Man, Shibuya, you really got me there. I just wanted to tease you a little, I **never** imagined you would actually take the chance to come out like that" Murata said with a sight that made it look like he had been holding his breath for the longest time. "You're gonna give me a heart attack one of these days"

"Come out?" Wolfram asked before Yuuri had a chance to respond, Murata had said the words in english, not japanese, and even though the earpiece translated english as well, the phrasing seemed odd to him.

"Yes, here on Earth when someone confesses publicly that they are attracted to the same sex, it's said that they come out of the closet" Ken explained, well aware that his explanation didn't really said much, not to someone unfamiliar with lgbtq lingo, at least.

"Why?" Wolfram inquired like a small child who's asking why the grass in green.

"Well… Maybe it's because until that point they were hiding a part of themselves, like, behind closed doors? You could say it's a metaphor" Ken thought that would be the best way to put it, and hoped he wasn't over simplifying the concept.

"So we both _came out_ just now then?" Wolfram directed that question at Yuuri, who only then realized he hadn't just come out himself, he had outed Wolfram too, which was a really puzzling thing, considering Wolfram had no idea of what _gay_ even was, it wasn't a necessary concept for him.

"Trust me, I didn't intend to do that at all" Yuuri said, mostly talking to Murata, addressing the issue of the heart attack from before. "But yeah, and it went better than I expected"

"They're good people, and they admire and look up to you for teaching them" Ken said, changing into Daikenja mode for a second.

That tone of voice and that look made Wolfram instinctively increase the space between them while walking. Old habits die hard, in deed.

"I owe much to them as well" Yuuri said, looking at the sky. Those guys had welcomed him as their coach and friend, and had helped him regain his love for the sport he had been running away from, until becoming the Maou. Furthermore, they had been so accepting of his relationship, and made an effort to put him at ease. Well, at least most of them had.

"But I could tell Hayga was uncomfortable, he hardly said a word after that" Hayga was the one who had given Yuuri more trouble in the team. Yuuri considered a valuable player and they generally got along well, but Hayga was too impatient, and that caused problems often, he reminded Yuuri of himself in that respect. When the time came for him to retire, he chose Kinou to be the next captain, and Hayga wasn't happy about that at all, Yuuri knew that all too well, but hoped that, over time, he would come to realize the reason for that decision.

"You can't win them all Shibuya" Ken said, placing a hand on his friend and King's shoulder. It was a phrase applicable to both sides of Shibuya Yuuri.

"I know" Yuuri said and looked at Wolfram with a smile

And I'm prepared for that now, he thought.

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* * *

*I'm using honorifics in this story, I usually don't, but I want to convey the relationships between the speakers through the way they address each other.

**I always make this clarification, Yuuri refers to Murata as Megane, Megane-kun or Glasses-kun in english, but is a term of endearment, not of mockery.

***To those of you who read manga, this must be a known expression, it means he wishes to apply to Tokyo Uni.

 **AN:** That was longer than I expected. I hope you're enjoying reading this. I really want to portray a realistic process, in which the characters grow and confront their inner fears, without getting too OoC. I wonder if I'm pulling it off or not? Any comments in this regard will be greatly appreciated.


	5. Conviction

**Warning:** This story is rated M, and from this point on, it will include graphic depictions of violence and scenes of a sexual nature. I know you're not going to listen to me, but I'll say it anyways, if you're under 18, please refrain from reading. Even without those scenes, this story is thought out to be for mature audiences, because of the plot itself.

 **Also, this is only half of this chapter, I just really wanted to post this today, read the AN at the end to know why.**

 **A response to an anonymous reviewer:** Oh my god… your review almost made me cry. I'm so glad that this story touched you like that. I drew from my own experience to write this, so I understand what you went through, what you're probably still going through, as am I. I love reading and writing fun and light fics in this fandom, but I thought it was necessary to take things a bit more seriously for a moment, and actually address Yuuri's process, having been raised in a homophobic society and coming out. I hope you reviewed with a user so we could talk more, but I hope you'll let me know if you're still there, and if the story meets your expectations in the following chapters. Really, thank you so much for what you said, you made me pick this story back up.

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* * *

 _Conviction. Part one_

It was sunday morning and Wolfram was sitting in the living room, reading one of Miko-san's light romance novels, with a dictionary also in hand. They had already been on Earth for three weeks, and Yuuri was at his school, attending a game of his former baseball team. It was actually the last time he would step inside the school grounds, even though the actual graduation was not for another two weeks. Yuuri had decided to skip the ceremony now that he had taken all of his exams, knowing his absence in Shin Makoku had been already too long. They were to depart on tuesday, after taking care of some paperwork on monday, and having a last good meal with the family, for what would probably be a long time, for them at least.

Wolfram was wearing cargo shorts and a white t-shirt with a band logo, he didn't know the band, but the design had caught his eye when shopping with Miko-san. There really wasn't any kind of clothing that resembled the ones people worn on Earth, back in Shin Makoku. Wolfram was starting to worry he was getting used to the lightness of the fabrics, and, being honest, even though he loved his uniform, this was so much comfortable, specially considering the heat of summer. Not to mention the shoes, sneakers were so easy to move in. But overall, this kind of outfit lacked a certain aesthetic quality, in his opinion.

"Wolf-chan, I was thinking we could go out to the mall, I have a hair appointment at noon. If you come with me, afterwards we could go pick Yuuri up from school and eat out" Miko-san said from the kitchen. She had been absentmindedly looking through a magazine for a good twenty minutes.

Wolfram remembered how his mother had felt when he graduated from the academy. She had been happy, of course. But when she thought he wasn't looking, she had shown this really forlorn expression. After becoming a parent to Greta himself, he had come to understand the reason for that, it was hard to see your kids growing, and maybe not needing you as much anymore.

"I'd love to" he answered, getting up from the couch and showing her a kind smile.

The past couple of weeks had been, somewhat enlightening, and also, somewhat confusing for Wolfram. He was beginning to understand Yuuri's concerns a little better, but he was still very puzzled by the earthen way of thinking about what they called _homosexuality_. Yuuri had been attending school and taking exams for the entire time they had been there, so he had either been out of studying, most of the time. Wolfram didn't really mind, he was used to that, their schedules didn't really match up all that much back home either, so the only constant was the fact that they were the first person they saw in the morning, and the last at night.

But because of this, the person with whom he had spent the most time had been Miko-san, and thus, he had asked her about his newly found doubts. He didn't remember just how he had phrased the question at the time, but the image of the usually cheerful woman's expression darkening, was definitely stuck on his head.

Miko-san told him about homosexuals, lesbians and also bisexuals, which apparently he was, to his surprise. And also said there were a lot more words used to describe other types of attraction between people of different genders, she even said there were people who identified as the opposite sex to which they were born, and that they were called transexuals. Wolfram had to take a moment at that point, to digest the information. It wasn't any new information, back in Shin Makoku there were people who would fall into any of those categories, but there weren't any names for them, people just were who they were, and loved who they loved. That was it, they didn't need a label.

It was really hard for him to understand the need to classify people in such a way, and it was even harder to hear that all of those people were usually rejected by society for just… being who they were. When he asked the reason for this, Miko-san hadn't been able to answer fully, she had told him that there were many factors, one of them being religion, which was also a bit of a foreign concept for him as a mazoku.

He knew humans back home also practiced religion in a very similar way to humans on Earth, but he had never liked the whole concept. In his opinion, it was only a system designed to subdue people. He didn't consider himself heretic, he had a deep respect for the gods, but the way humans organized around religion was usually, in his experience, no more than a facade to hide the true intentions of those humans who placed themselves at the top of the piramide.

Miko-san had introduced him to an entirely new world of terms and concepts he never knew existed, and found himself wondering why hadn't Yuuri explained them to him sooner. Maybe if he had, Wolfram wouldn't have been so insensitive about it, and also, he wouldn't have had to suffer so much, believing he was in a hopeless relationship all those years.

After a few days pondering over it, he realized Yuuri had hid this information from him, probably for his own good. In his own wimpy way, Yuuri had been trying to protect him from a harsh reality. And not only him, being the kind hearted man that he was, he probably hadn't wanted for this kind of mindset to travel across the dimensions with him, because, deep down, all Yuuri ever wants is to see the people he cares about smile. If it became known that the Maou had this sort of beliefs, it wouldn't have been long before they spread across the land.

Becoming aware of this had made Wolfram happy for two reasons; the first, he was moved by Yuuri's desire to protect him; the second, he wasn't so proud of. Being honest, he had never, for one second, stopped loving Yuuri, but that didn't mean he didn't resent him a little until that point. Even if his intentions were good, even if he now understood his reasons, that didn't erase the fact of Wolfram's pain still being there, and Yuuri being the culprit. It had been almost six years! Six years of waiting, six years of insecurities, six years of rejection, six years of humiliation. Even if it was petty on his part, knowing that Yuuri had his own share of pain, made him feel a tiny bit better, in a dark, deep place inside his heart.

It was just a little though, he mainly just wanted to be able to erase that pain from Yuuri's heart, and protect him in the same way that Yuuri had wanted to protect him, so because of that, he didn't tell Yuuri about his new knowledge on the lgbt community, he figured he probably didn't really understand enough of the subject anyway.

Once they got to the mall, a place to which Wolfram just could not get used to, no matter how many times they went, he let himself be dragged from store to store by Miko-san, while they waited for the time for her appointment. She bought several things for him and Yuuri to take back home, a plush panda for Gwendal, an ink pen for Günter with several recharges, a book in english for Conrart, a beautiful sundress for Greta, a bottle of perfume for Wolfram's mother, and finally two packages for him and Yuuri, that she didn't let him see.

Wolfram was so happy that this woman was going to be his mother in law, she had a certain something about her, a kind of magic, which made him feel loved and safe. He was ashamed of the way he had spoken of her, without even knowing her, but he didn't regret it, if it hadn't been for that idiotic remark he once made about her, he would have never become Yuuri's fiance, and he probably would have never come to love him.

"Wolf-chan, dear, I'm gonna go inside the hair salon now, would you keep an eye on the bags for me? I won't be long" She said. They hadn't actually been in the mall for even an hour, but she had managed to buy so much stuff so fast, it amazed Wolfram, who generally took about an hour to pick out a single suit, not because he enjoyed shopping all that much, but because he was a bit picky, maybe more than a bit.

"Sure, Mother" he answered, taking all the bags from her hand, adding them to the ones he was already carrying.

"Call me mama, Wolf-chan! And don't peak at the presents for you and Yuuri!" She said and merrily entered the hairdresser's shop, that had a big sign in the form of giant scissors on the front entrance.

Wolfram took a seat on one of the resting tables in the middle of the big aisle, surrounded by shops, next to an artificial waterfall in the center of it, that was illuminated by moving lights of several colors. He put the packages and bags on the table and let himself fall on the chair. Women had a lot of energy when it came to shopping, for some reason he didn't really understand. His mother and Greta were the same, they would always drag him from shop to shop when they went shopping in town, and when the tailor came to the castle, they would try on a hundred different things before maybe choosing one or two of them. Well, he couldn't say they weren't thrifty that way though.

Then he noticed there was a little newspaper stand with free copies for the people on the resting area to read. He picked one up and thought he might as well give it a try, he didn't have Yuuri's dictionary with him, but it was better than doing nothing while waiting.

There wasn't anything too interesting or too complicated in the first couple of pages, although there was still a lot of words he couldn't understand. There was something about a woman, a celebrity of sorts, having been discovered either coming out or going into the apartment of another celebrity, he couldn't really make up which one it was. Then there was a story about a politician, and his opinion regarding the decrease of natality of the country, it said that japan had the largest amount of citizens over the age of one hundred in the world, if he wasn't reading it wrong. He thought that was definitely an accomplishment, for humans, and made a mental note to ask Yuuri about it later.

He kept flipping through the pages, he could understand most of it, but whenever a person would come up, he would have absolutely no idea of who they were, or their significance, so he didn't really know if he was reading anything of actual importance or not.

And then, he found a headline that made his blood run cold, _The worst massacre of USA since 11-S. At approximately two am. today, terrorist irrupts into homosexual nightclub and kills at least fifty people, injuring another fifty, before being gunned down by police.(1)_

Words such as gunned, massacre and kill were amongst the first he learned how to read, because some of his practice material had been history books, the thing that surprised him was the word he had learned just recently, homosexual. He continue reading and found that the author of the crime had sworn his allegiance to what he assumed was some sort of terrorist organization, before performing his massacre. The president of the country had apparently classified the act as a crime of hate. _Crime of hate…_ he had hear Yuuri say those words before, referring to the conflicts between mazoku and humans, just because of their race, which he had come to understand was nonsensical over the years, but was sexuality even an equivalent of race?

Had this man really just gone and killed fifty innocent people, just because they were homosexuals? There were pictures of people crying outside the building that was surrounded by police cars, and also of some of the victims. Yuuri had always told him than Earth wasn't like Shin Makoku, that there was peace, and people didn't carry swords or guns with them because it was safe. How had this happened then? Was it normal for people to get killed like this, because of who they loved?

He felt his heart aching at the thought. He had been naive, he had underestimated Yuuri's fear, and his struggle to come to love him.

The story was two pages long, and it talked about a lot of things Wolfram didn't understand, a lot of words written in katakana, meaning they came from a different language. There were a lot of names, most of the victims that had already been identified. That made it all the more horrible. Wolfram wasn't a stranger to death and tragedy, he had lived through a war, but knowing the names of the people that died, putting an identity to the lifeless bodies, made it seem much more real, even though he was just peacefully sitting down in a mall, with no sense of danger near him, those people were dead. They were dead because of a characteristic that he shared with them, because they were men who loved other men.

Did that man really believe he was doing something good by killing these people?

"Of course he did" An old man had answered to the thought, he then realized, he had voiced out loud. He was sitting on the table next to his, with another man of approximately the same age. They were both reading the paper as well.

"What do you mean?" Wolfram asked, intrigued by the man's comment.

"You were talking about the guy who killed the fags, right?" he retorted, fixing his posture to face Wolfram, and putting down the paper in his hands.

"The fags?" Wolfram asked, he had never heard that word before, but by the tone the man had used, he guessed it was an insult.

"Yeah, the fags, the gays, the homos, you know what I mean" The man was a little overweight, and was wearing a plaid shirt, which had just came out of his pants on one side, because of the vivid hand gestures he was making to illustrate Wolfram of his meaning.

"You say that he thought he was doing the right thing?" Wolfram asked in disbelief. As he did, the other man also faced in his direction and put down his paper. He was wearing a suit and seemed like a pretty neat person, in contrast with his companion.

"I'm saying that he did the right thing, kid" Wolfram's eyes widened, as a surge of anger started to fill his stomach and chest. "We're better off with all those dick suckers gone to hell, where they belong" he said proudly, and confidently, as if what he was speaking was nothing less than the absolute truth.

"What gives you the right to say that!?" Wolfram asked, raising his voice, but still fighting the urge to get up and punch the lights out of the old fart.

"It's not a matter of having the right or not" The other man finally spoke. "It's a matter of common sense. They're abnormal and corrupt society with their ways. Just look at where they were, a nightclub of all places. They were probably taking drugs and fornicating within themselves." he said, adjusting his thick glasses, that were falling down the bridge of his nose, because of the downright angle in which he was looking at Wolfram.

In that moment Wolfram felt something snap inside of him, he couldn't remember the last time he had been so angry. Who were these men to speak so lowly of people they had never even met. What had the victims of this atrocity done wrong to deserve to be judged by these strangers, even in death?

But although he was angry, so much that his skin burned, he found himself feeling incredibly sad, and helpless. There was something about the way these men expressed themselves that made him feel small. They were not just talking about the people who died, they were also talking about him. They were judging him.

"How can you speak in such a way! What about their mothers, their fathers!? How can you insult the memory of the deceased with such arrogance!?" He said while standing up, knowing his last bit of self control was about to leave him, he felt he was about to cry, and also, about to kill them.

"If they raised a freak like that, then they had it coming" The fat man said, flatly.

That was it. Oh Shinou, That. Was. It. He was going to kill them, he might not have his fire but he could still beat them to death.

"You…" he said menacingly, as he approached the men slowly, but then…

"Wolf-chan"

Wolfram's head jolted back, hearing the familiar voice. Miko-san was behind him, right behind him, he hadn't even noticed her approaching him because of how mad he was.

"Wolf-chan, this ignorant pigs don't deserve your attention, sweetie" She said softly, smiling in a way that was somehow really scary. "Go get our bags honey, or we'll be late to pick up Yuu-chan"

Wolfram felt all the energy in his body was drained out by those words, he had been about to do something he was surely going to bring them a whole lot of problems. His sanity was slowly returning, but the feelings of anger and sadness wouldn't disappear that easily. Once he had grabbed all the bags and packages he turned to Miko-san, who was still facing the two men.

"Now, listen you two, because I will only say this once" She said, walking over to the table, as calmly as if she was asking them the time. "I may not want my beautiful son in law to dirty his hands with scum like you, but trust me, you do not want to anger Hamano Jennifer. So before that happens, how about you get your heads out of the fifteenth century and maybe also learn the valuable lesson of just shutting up, if you have nothing intelligent to say. My **son** andhis **fiance** , are both my children…" She leaned closer to the fat man, who looked like he had just seen a ghost. "And nobody messes with my children"

She turned around to face Wolfram, her smile still impeccably placed. Wolfram was so stunned he momentarily forgot how to walk.

"Bye bye gentlemen" She tilted her head to the side innocently as she said that, and then grabbed Wolfram's arm to lead the way out of the mall.

 _To be continued..._

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I got this from an actual headline of the day after the massacre at Pulse, before the body count was confirmed (50 dead, one of them being the shooter, and 53 seriously injured)

 **AN:** Okay guys, so, here's the deal, I'm gonna be talking from my own experience here, so bear with me for a while. I've encountered that coming out, for those of us who are lucky, is a bittersweet experience, you encounter rejection and acceptance alternately, whether it comes from your family, your friends, your classmates, your co-workers, or even complete strangers on the streets. For those who are unlucky, it is only bitter. Living as an openly gay man or lesbian woman (or any other in the lgbtq spectre) is hard in this society still, and I wanted for Wolfram in this story to understand that, and for Yuuri to live through it.

When something like the massacre at Pulse happens, I think it is necessary to take a moment and realize the gravity of the situation, and not forget it easily. That is why I started this story last year, and also why I included it here, exactly one year after that horrible tragedy. I know you came to the site looking for an entertaining story, and not a sermon about LGBTQ rights, so I'll make this short:

I don't know you, but if you enjoy my stories it means that you don't have a problem with same sex relationships, in fact, it means that you probably support them, so I hope each and every one of you takes that into actual action, and if you're faced with a situation like the one Wolfram was faced in this chapter, or the ones that will come in future chapters, you'll act as an ally, speak up, lend your shoulder to the victim at least, you never know when a LGBTQ youth is listening, and their self esteem is being undermined. This is Pride month, so everything LGBTQ related get a bit more attention, but let's stand together with pride all year long, as "members" of the community or as allies :)

Thank you those of you who took the time to read my not so little author's note here, even though I kinda got a bit heavy.

 **PS:** I do realize I just outed myself, I don't really mind. I also realize that, because of the time difference between Orlando and Japan, the timeline is a bit messed up here, it was just too much of a hazzle to explain that in the story, so I eliminated the time difference altogether, sorry for that.


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